just want to know y its advised to use a mixed grip when deadlifting? i dont coz it feels odd but want to know am i missing out on something by not? also my hams ache more than my bk am i doing them wrong or is it cause i have such week legs?

I thought the mixed grip was to do with balance but I am not sure - anyway it is a personal pref thing so if you don't like it don't do it as it is never good to force your joints to do things they don't like. If you do go over to it though make sure you alternate the grips with your sets, left hand forward facing one set then right hand forward facing the next set. As for hams deadlifts also works them so that will be why. Always maintain good form (I am sure you know this as you are an old hand) make sure you are contracting/squeezing your lower back muscles at the top with the chest up and head looking forward not looking down, but be careful not to push the belly forward thus curving the lower spine, keep that core tight.

cheers for that bozza put my mind at rest a bit. as for form its not great coz ive slipped more discs than pete tong but never training just work and play. and old hand lol you pulling my leg yes ive been training on and off since i was 14 but never kept at it long enough to make serous muscle. like you brutes yes you know who you are.  :P